Last night, arriving home from work, I knew exactly what I would be doing: meeting a friend before dinner, eating dinner with my wife, followed by a plan for the night’s activities (this much reading, that much time on the computer, et cetera).  It seemed reasonable until, following dinner, my wife wanted to flop on the couch to read, and this just looked like the most appealing thought of the day.
I realized in that moment that I had carried over my regimented scheduling practice past the semester and into what was supposed to be my vacation.  I had needed this level of organization to get through my studies, work and Capoeira, but now I had taken to viewing even my leisure activities in terms of getting as much done as possible.  I had to let go of that, and the first step was flopping on that couch with my wife and reading a novel I enjoyed, not because of any technical brilliance in it (I like the author, but this was his first book and it shows) but because I like the characters and story.
This was the first time since last December that I had been able to just read fiction – my previous attempts had been mired in constant analysis.  I did take a moment to consider the craft of the story, just to reassure myself that I could, then relaxed and enjoyed myself.
I’m not reading quite the way I used to; even without the near-dissection I find myself noting devices, techniques, and elements I had missed previously as well as how they are related.  My perspective has shifted, and I like it – I think it makes me a better reader as well as a better writer, because I can appreciate a story on more levels.
So long as I remember to slow down and enjoy reading instead of just appreciating it. . . .
I’m still restricting myself to a few hundred words of freewriting every day or two while my hand heals, but I really like the results I’m getting.  I’ve been starting with the first image I can call to mind and then telling a story about it, and if I don’t like it I just let it change directions.  So far I have several snippets that could be developed into good short stories, and one or two that might be deep enough for a novel.
I think by next week I’ll let myself start some revision, as long as I can keep the typing in check.  Oh, and I may start drafting new material by playing with voice recognition software.  I doubt I could use it for real revision, but it should be fine for a first draft, as well as holding back my typing a little longer.